im about as happy as oj after his trial
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
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