So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
