shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
