your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
