He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
