Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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