I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
