she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
