Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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