she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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