If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
