told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
