erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize