if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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