Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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