You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
