You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
you will always have a special place in my vag
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
