Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
