Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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