I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize