Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
