Kiss
Puke
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
