She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize