People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
