I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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