what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize