...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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