Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize