Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You can't just leave with hair like that
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize