There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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