Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
