Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I don't deserve a penis
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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