I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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