I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
