I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
i believe in u and ur pee
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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