Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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