i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
