Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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