im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
