Im at strip club and am horny
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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