I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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