I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
