One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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