I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
