So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
