who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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