This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
