ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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