Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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