I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
You smell like stripper and shame
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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